a letter from Sullivan Ballou (A Rhode Island Yankee lawyer turned major at the start of the Civl War) addressed to his wife:

July 14, 1861
Camp Clark, Washington

My very dear Sarah:
The indications are very strong that we shall move in a few days—perhaps tomorrow. Lest I should not be able to write again, I feel impelled to write a few lines that may fall under your eye when I shall be no more . . .

I have no misgivings about, or lack of confidence in the cause in which I am engaged, and my courage does not halt or falter. I know how strongly American Civilization now leans on the triumph of the Government and how great a debt we owe to those who went before us through the blood and sufferings of the Revolution. And I am willing—perfectly willing—to lay down all my joys in this life, to help maintain this Government, and to pay that debt . . .

Sarah my love for you is deathless, it seems to bind me with mighty cables that nothing but Omnipotence could break; and yet my love of Country comes over me like a strong wind and bears me unresistibly on with all these chains to the battle field.

The memories of the blissful moments I have spent with you come creeping over me, and I feel most gratified to God and to you that I have enjoyed them for so long. And hard it is for me to give them up and burn to ashes the hopes of future years, when, God willing, we might still have lived and loved together, and seen our sons grown up to honorable manhood, around us. I have, I know, but few and small claims upon Divine Providence, but something whispers to me—perhaps it is the wafted prayer of my little Edgar, that I shall return to my loved ones unharmed. If I do not my dear Sarah, never forget how much I love you, and when my last breath escapes me on the battle field, it will whisper your name. Forgive my many faults and the many pains I have caused you. How thoughtless and foolish I have often times been! How gladly would I wash out with my tears every little spot upon your happiness . . .

But, O Sarah! If the dead can come back to this earth and flit unseen around those they loved, I shall always be near you; in the gladdest days and in the darkest nights . . . always, always, and if there be a soft breeze upon your cheek, it shall be my breath, as the cool air fans your throbbing temple, it shall be my spirit passing by. Sarah do not mourn me dead; think I am gone and wait for thee, for we shall meet again . . .

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The letter didn't even make it to his widow; she subsequently lived till 80 but never remarried. She was 24 when she became a widow to her deceased 32 year old husband. They had two boy but at the time of Sarah's death, it was not believed that she had any surviving relatives. This has been THE SADDEST LETTER EVER.

But man dudes back then could write.

"Hey, this might be a good idea." - anonymous

It's never a good idea. Conversely - don't be a pussy.

I'm going to write fortune cookie fortunes for a living one day.

Oh yeah, the lucky numbers: 12 27 33 07 04

In no particular order:

1. Blade Runner
2. Joe vs. the Volcano (the only tom hanks/meg ryan worth a damn)
3. Sahara
4. Castle of Cagliostro (kah-lee-o-stro)
5. Urusei Yatsura 2: Beautiful Dreamer (Ur-oo-see Yat-zur-ah)
6. Se7en
7. To Kill a Mockingbird
8. Kingdom of Heaven (the director's cut ... wooooooo)
9. Great Expectations (what a bitch)
10. Legend (Darkness loses to Tom Cruise. oh well)
11. Howl's Moving Castle
12. Porco Rosso (the French track is awesome - JEAN RENO as Porco)
13. Amelie (seriously, how can you hate it?)
14. Drop Dead Gorgeous (lost in korea ... bastard)
15. Rocky
16. Macross: Do You Remember Love (giant robots vs. giant aliens ...)
17. Roman Holiday/Breakfast at Tiffany's (double feature or bust)
18. Arachnophobia (the single scariest film ever conceived)
19. Princess Bride
20. Slap Shot/Major League (best sports movies ever)
21. Spaceballs ("Comb the desert!")
22. the second half of Dude, Where's My Car? (surprised? me too.)
23. Love Actually (pretty much any Hugh Grant movie ... shut up)
24. Three Kings
25. Batman Begins
26. Good Night, and Good Luck
27. Hole (holy crap this is disturbing)
28. Intolerable Cruelty
29. Hudson Hawk
30. Tombstone
31. American Psycho
32. Young Einstein (best kitten rescue ever. plus, bubbles in beer)
33. Out of Sight
34. The Limey (Zod on an ass kicking streak)
35. Hana-bi (the host of MXC is a badass)
36. Ghostbusters ("Listen, you smell that?")
37. Real Genius
38. A Life Less Ordinary (award for greatest karaoke scene in history)
39. Wonder Boys ("I've got tenure.")
40. Spartan
41. Mr. & Mrs. Smith
42. Raiders of the Lost Arc (the other two are sorta meh.)
43. The Fountain
44. Stranger than Fiction
45. Children of Men
46. Monster Squad (Wolfman's got nards!)
47. Goonies
48. The Road Warrior (Mad Max 2 to the cool kids)
49. Mumford
50. Goldeneye
51. Mr. Baseball (C'mon, it's Tom Sellick)
52. Last of the Mohicans
53. Juno
54. to be continued ...

annnnd: Steve Martin movies. i can't help it. Cheaper by the Dozen? Saw that and its sequel.

this journal is here so i can be a geek and dork and all those things in betwixt  -- to post in the office community.  i hope you're thrilled to know this.